In a sense, it’s easy. Just simply prevent yourself from thinking about it and move on. Think of them as though they were memories from another lifetime that have nothing to do with you in the now.
1. Embrace the past
Embrace the past. Even those days you might be struggling with. This makes sense right? Why do you think we look back at photos of the good old days when everything was better? Because it reminds us of what we had!
Just embrace those events that may have helped you in the past! They may not help you right now, but they sure do remind you of what you had.
Doing this is not saying you have to have a love-fest with the past, no. You’re just reminding yourself of how strong you were once before. That you’re strong now, and you can go through this too.
2. Do not dwell
The past happened, but the future is yet to happen. I don’t care if you were raped or any other traumatic event happened. Dwelling on it or reliving it will only create more negative emotions in you. There’s nothing that can be done now. This is something that happened in the past. You can’t change it, and you can’t change it. It’s over, you can only move forward.
What you can do, is stop dwelling and doing anything in a negative way to let this negative experience keep you down. This will not be the case. You will simply move forward.
3. Embrace yourself
In some cases, the best way to get through a bad memory is by embracing the person who you are, and who you have become. It might sound a bit cheesy, but this is true! You have so much of your own personality to deal with, and this is where those traumatic memories will help you.
This might be a hard pill to swallow, but you need to accept that you are human and that you cannot change the past.
You have the power to change your future. You don’t have to live the life that your past has led you to! Yes, you can’t change the past, but you can change the future. You can find your own way out of any situation you are going through. It’s time to find that way out.
4. Understand
You may have many questions running through your mind, and they may make you feel like you don’t know what you are going through. That’s understandable. However, take your time. Understand that no one is going to give you the answer. You need to seek out those that have been through similar situations and understand what they went through.
You need to know that when you’ve been through a horrible event, you are going to be fine. No matter how devastating those events are, you’ll survive! If you were able to survive a traumatic event, then you can survive rape or any other traumatic experience as well.
The past may look really bad, but you can make it look better. You can be the person you are meant to be. You can make something out of the negative, that will help you become the person you are meant to be.
5. Look to the future
While you are trying to find your way through, look to the future. Think of what the future might look like. Think of how you can make the most out of your situation, and how you can turn it around to a positive situation.
Do not dwell on the past. You are here for a reason. Look to the future. Think of a way that you can make your situation better. That doesn’t mean you’ll escape the situation, but you can at least be the best you can.
6. Think about what happened
Think about what happened! That’s the one part of the process that really helps. This might sound weird to you, but you need to think about what happened. Try to recall the events as if you were there.
You need to relive the experience in your mind as though it’s happening all over again. You need to make sure that your body is in the same position as when that occurred. Your state of mind needs to be similar to when you were experiencing those events.
Try to recreate that. Think about how you felt, how things were said, who was there, the smells, the sounds. This helps to really bring the experience back to life. You need to experience the event through the mind.
7. Try to keep a positive frame of mind
This is the hardest thing to do. It is so difficult to keep a positive mind and do not allow negative thoughts in. You need to do your best to make sure that your mind stays positive.
You cannot afford to allow the negative thoughts to have a place in your mind. You have a whole life ahead of you. You need to stay positive for yourself. You’ll be okay. It’s going to get better.
8. Talk about it
Talking about it is the best thing to do. Talking about your feelings is the best way to get through it.
It’s best to talk to someone if that’s your inclination. If that’s not the case, you can go to a counsellor. You can talk to a psychologist. You need to talk to someone about your experience, and just ask for some advice.
Do your best to keep your emotions under control. Sometimes, if you don’t, the negative emotions will take over. Sometimes, it can get pretty bad, and that’s okay too. You can’t control the emotions in that situation, but you can control them before it gets that way.
If you think that you are about to break down, take some deep breaths and remind yourself of what is happening. You can only control your state of mind, and your mind will not allow you to give in to negative emotions.
9. Be strong and be yourself
It’s important to remember that you are the strongest person. If you are a strong person, you’ll be okay. You have what it takes to get through this. You can get through this. You can heal.
You can be strong. You have what it takes to deal with what happened. You just have to look inwards and remind yourself that you will be okay. You’ll get through it.
10. Keep your cool
Keeping your cool is one of the most important things to remember. Do not allow negative thoughts to ruin your life. Your life is important. It is important that you don’t let your emotions take control of you. If you keep your cool, you can make it through.
If you allow those emotions to take over, then you will fall apart. You can handle your negative emotions. You’ll be okay. You will survive this.
In meditation, think about positive things. Be it about your loved ones, children, nature, God or anything else, think of something that makes you happy and positive. Do not think about negative things.
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All from Muqaddas Angela's Blogs here angelamuqadas239@gmail.com, 07/02, 2022.
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